18th July 1819
Today I decided to write few words about the
experience of love at first sight, because I mentioned this previously.
Nothing special is happening now so I can spend time contemplating my own
emotions. Meditate with me today, my dear diary. You can pretend to be a
philosopher just like me.
What love at first sight is? Does it exist? Does
it exist not? I am an experienced person so I can say that it does. I would
like to explain it, describe it today.
When I met William, it was something
more than a crush. Obviously, I needed time to realize what I was feeling; what
happened to me that night. Well, you just stand there, you cannot take your
eyes off the loved one. It is beyond your ability to understand what is
happening. World simply disappears, you do not listen to anyone, even to him, you
do not think at all. At most, you relive inside the fact that he just spoken to
you. Obviously, you are unable of understanding his words. Later you may have
issues because of it, you will always feel guilty, but it is a totally
different story…
When I was in the ballroom, I felt there was some
kind of power that took me in its arms, and it made me levitate. This magic was
there, it took me away like flowers on wave. Electricity of lightning stroke me
twice and it never really let go. It was something more than falling to your
knees for that handsomeness of a stranger gentleman – it was a feeling that you
may never forget about him. You knew he may be someone important to you soon.
When you get to know each other, you start to understand that he is the one.
You feel like you have always known him. It is shocking to you when you realize
how much familiar he seems to be. You are sure that he is the one you have been
dreaming of, you created his characteristics in your mind, he is a perfect
kind. Statue made by you comes alive. Later he may burn you down, but he will
always be that perfect man like the very first chapter.
I was enchanted to meet him. I do not even know
what it was exactly. His smile? Light of his hair? The way his black tuxedo
fitted him? I have no idea. Maybe it was simply all that makes him… him. This
feeling hit my head, my heart, my soul. What is the most important is that he
felt the same. Our love is so strong, magical, extraordinary. Impossible to
choose right words. It is always not enough. There is always something more
that can be said.
You can only live it to understand.
Today I know that this love can break every
obstacle. At the beginning our love looked tragic and today? Today it probably
cannot get any better. Sometimes I feel side effects of hard past, but I know
that one day it will pass eventually. I know that this high tension will always
come back to me. This flame will always burn the brightest and hottest. Stars
of this love will always shine again after storm.
You are my tree, my rainbow, William. You are the
softest pillow, the most valuable porcelain vase. I may cry tomorrow but it is
only because I love you so.
What are you doing, my sunshine? I cannot see
you… Yes, I am looking through the window right now… Are you thinking kindly of
me too? Do you sometimes memorise our first kiss? Then? Underneath crescent
moon? Among trees? In my parents’ arbour? Do you remember how you used to take
your horse and ride to see me, just to squeeze my little hand?
My mood is very romantic… I guess I really shall
write a book. I remember your joke, which you throw in the air casually when we
were in our way, then, in the carriage.
In this case, I can forgive my old friend. I will
write her back. Maybe I will rewrite the letter below… Maybe I will also rewrite or
stick a little poem which William gave me just after our first kiss. This is
what diary was made for. Oh! I will also cut, bring a flower, lilac or any
other kind of plant, and stick it here too. See you tomorrow!
Letter:
Dear Juliette!
It has been few years and I have never forgotten
about my broken heart or good moments we shared when we were younger. Today I
finally decided to forgive you and answer for your letter. I must confess that
your braveness really surprised me.
I do not know what more I can say so I simply
invite you to us to mountains. You will finally meet our daughter Mary. Come necessarily
to village XXX and we will try to make up for forfeited years of our
friendship.
I hope you also forgive me and will want to arrive,
ma cherie.
Bisous, best wishes
Elizabeth
William’s visiting card:
Burning red your dress
Puts me in a hot mess
White your angelic dress
Makes me feel no less
Blue ocean your eyes
Are deeper cleaner twice
Comments
Post a Comment