14th August 1819
Thought, prayer, work, and act.
I know it is an extraordinary beginning of today note…
But this is where secret worlds hide… Mystical truths! This is where I will
start today… And I will continue explaining yesterday evening scenes, patriotic-historical
memorizing next! It may take some time… But I have such a spiritual need today.
I think a lot about spiritual things another day.
I am not an enthusiast of totally new religious currents, but I believe that distinction
of good and bad powers makes sense. I am talking about angelic presence in
everyday life and nature, and Devil temptations. Do evil whispers play a part
in politics too? Surely. Thirst for power is not probably good when you strive
for it leaving full graves behind your back. When you crave for a revolution
because you want people to live better – that is a good reason, an idea from
above. Napoleon Bonaparte made so many people believe, he gave them hope, but
is it good to call yourself a god? Such gods can only be pagan… Whereas, striving
to gather the compatriots to fight for independence... That is much better!
This is an honourable bloodshed! Not only the pursuit of possession and titles
matter…
My country is happy to be free… And my brother
can rule! I do not know if I could live in a world where I would lose my
position, even the possibility of using my own language... Misery of unhappy
people! I will have to go to these legendary lands someday and help these
people somehow. With good deeds and good word. Yes. After all, my servant comes
from there! It is good that this simple girl speaks a language like mine...
Thanks to this, we can easily come to an understanding.
Anyway... By origin... It is also my homeland, which
I have never known. My parents never even taught me about these lands, history,
and culture! They were too sad... They could not do this... And my brother
became the king of this foreign world... This is my present and only reality...
How can I say that this country, which I have never known, is my home and
destiny then? This is only an important part of my relatives' past… It is good
that I know anything about it!
Bien, now let me come back to the initial few
words. Somehow my plans are not going successively...
Every day we should meditate on the events of the
past day. Every day we should impose ourselves some goals on eyes. Every day we
should fulfil and exceed ourselves. We should work, but resolutely. We also must
make dreams come true and not waste time because life is too short! Not every
dream will fall at your feet, crying out I am waiting for you until you come me true.
Too late you may wake up and understand that your only purpose in life is death...
So, we will pray and act when we have the
opportunity!
What about my William? Ah, Willy! Now I must
write few words about yesterday evening. In the end I had all night to think
about it! Ah, My dear Willy, the dearest!
Well, what did it all mean? All in all, I think I
have already told you all about it… Ritual, references to romance, symbols and…
music! My lover had his vision of a romantic evening and he fulfilled it
perfectly in real life. It was highly poetic...
Nothing has happened today yet… But in the end,
something will happen… It is the quietest just before the storm.
We will see tomorrow! And I will tell you for
sure what fate brought! God obviously too!
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